The Enemies of an Abundant Lifestyle

0:01
Welcome to Jon Michail’s Personal Branding Masterclass. Jon is the founder and CEO of Image Group International and an award-winning image consulting and personal branding pioneer established in 1989. This podcast will bring you old-school wisdom, inspiring ideas, strategies, and hacks for the new tech world. Here you will learn everything about personal branding: the system, the techniques, and the right mindset to have a successful personal brand, image, and reputation.

0:30
Hello, everybody, and welcome to our show today. Before we start, I kindly ask you to rate the show on Apple Podcast. Today, we're going to be talking about the enemies of what we would call our abundant lifestyle. And we break up the word lifestyle into two because it's about having a life and living it, you know, with an abundance that says there are no limitations out there. And the enemy, of course, of an abundant lifestyle, is all sorts of what we would say is self-sabotage aspects of being. But at the same time, what I also want to note is that the opposite of abundance or abundant is scarcity. And that's the opposite, obviously, of having it all. So I'm going to give you what Stephen Covey said around the term abundance mentality or abundance mindset, in his best-selling book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, I want to also make a caveat, that he wasn't the first one to say that. But of course, he's one of the ones that popularized that, in modern culture, it defined the term simply as a consequence, each person believes there are enough resources and successes to share with others. And overall, I actually agree with that, I agree with that, to the core of my being because power, you have choices with it, you can use power to share and help and make a difference in this lifetime. Or you can use power to basically what I would say is power over control people make their life hard, you know, specifically get them to do things, for your purposes only, as opposed to a win-win for everybody. So I think there is an opportunity here to, you know, from, from a mindset perspective, to look at this, and say, you know, what is it for you right now that you're looking, you know, assuming you want to live more abundantly. So abundance for myself is basically maximizing every opportunity, you know, having fun along the way, enjoying the moment, and at the same time knowing that life is short, and we're not going to be here forever. You know, so, of course, I've got so much more to that. But I won't, you know, but that's for a very simplistic perspective. You know, that's what abundance means to me. Of course, you can throw in all the other things there, of course, happy family, business, Korea cetera. But the concept is, obviously something that, you know, from a philosophical point of view, means yes, there is an opportunity to have everything, especially when you're born into an environment that actually provides that if you live in, you know, many countries around the world with that still possible. There's really no excuse. Of course, there's other countries right now that that becomes harder. And especially if you're living in a war environment, or another form of a dangerous type of climate there, of course, that becomes a little bit more challenging. But let's get the show on the road. So living an abundant life is obviously everyone's dream. If they drill down, we all want to live a prosperous life, but we can be happy, you know, healthy and of course, love. While it might seem difficult for some people, in reality, we already have what it takes to live an abundant life. And that's going back to what I mentioned before, and the resources and the environment they live in. And really, even without that, the human spirit has got that possibility, as long as it makes choices along the way to draw on that power. You know, and of course, mindset is very important here and specifically say, you know, that's, that's the life I want to lead. And that could include, of course, Korea, business, relationships, etc. And then you go out there and do it, you know, so for me, this starts from running first principles. It's a first principle concept to believe, also that there is abundance out there, as opposed to strategies and tactics. I think this is very important. philosophically, your first principles, I believe, you know, are the driver that makes everything else happen. The problem is out there that also there are many enemies that prevent you from having an abundant lifestyle. And I will explain some of them to you and give you some tips on how to avoid falling into some of these traps. But these enemies, in this instance, today, I want to call these enemies, our self-perpetuating enemies as opposed to some external force that is creating or desiring harm to you. And the first one that I'd like to share with you, and there are many, by the way, but I want to keep it to five today. And the first one is ignorance. You know, and ignorance, of course, is a chosen concept for a lot of people, they prefer to be ignorant and know. And, of course, for others that don't know what they don't know, you know, so ignorance, be ignorant of something for whatever reason, you know, and ignorance could also be, you know, a form of intellectual dishonesty, or willful ignorance, you're willfully ignorant, for whatever reason. And so ignorance is a big one. Now, if you're into critical thinking, and you're into curiosity, and you're into exploring concepts, ideas, that basically are designed really to help you as a human being, then ignorance is no place that, especially if you know, you know, there's sometimes you've got to do something, and that's been conscious of it, and then you don't do it. Well, then obviously, that's a form of what we call self-sabotage. How can you avoid it? Well, again, you know, this is going to be fairly simple. And it's gonna be two words, stop doing it. That's it, stop doing it. Now, this is going to be very simple in the world right now, where people are looking at all sorts of constant answers to why things don't work in their lives and a mental health crisis that we've got worldwide, right now around people losing the sense of their identity, who they are, et cetera. But it's not as difficult as sometimes and complex as we'd like to think it is, you know, and so the concept around is, how do you avoid it? Well, first of all, when I said, stop it, well, yes, stop being ignorant, you know, go into the conversation and basically become an autodidact, keep on learning, keep on exploring, keep on looking for new possibilities. And the next enemy there will be also in the enemies that I'm sharing with you today is lack of patience. You know, it's really interesting, because I can't tell you how many young people I've met in the last 20 odd years. But even the last 10 years, the last five years, lack of patience. Patience is not there anymore. Because in the social media world, especially that we live in today, it's all about instant gratification. You know, you can't wait too much. Everyone wants to be Zuckerberg, in 24 hours, right? They're 16 years old, and they all want to become Zuckerberg. And we know that throughout history, Success takes time, you know, it's like a seed, when you plant the seed in the ground, it doesn't grow into a tree in 24 hours, it grows slowly, you've got to nurture it, you got to cultivate it, you got to let the sun you know, touch it, you gotta feed it with water, and nutrients, et cetera. So takes an effort, okay, so when you're expecting things to happen quickly, bang, bang, bang, and you'll hear a lot of this species on the internet, let's crush it, it doesn't work like that you can't crush anything, everything basically has, you know, and incubation period, it takes a little bit of time. So patience is very, very important. And how do you basically avoid, obviously, this, this enemy is by becoming very clear, obviously, on your goals and your aspirations and your wants, etc. And knowing that it's going to start, it's going to middle and it's going to finish, you can't start and go finish, bang without missing out with missing out the middle. So this is very important. The third one is a need for control. Well, this is really a big one for a lot of people. And control could be also you know, a perfectionist mindset. It could be also an attitude that says, you know, I'm not willing to fail again, all conditioning, a need to control my B also, you know, you want to do everything for whatever reason, and you don't want to share that or collaborate that with others operating like a lone wolf, a dangerous concept long term. So how you deal With that is learning, you know, and how to avoid it is learning how to go with the flow. And what does that mean? Well, if you ever have tried to swim upstream in a river,
you know the experience of what that felt like what that looks like, and certainly the perspective of that whole experience, how tough that would have been. So learning to go with the flow is knowing that the river flows downstream. So knowing how to pick the stream is an essential component of a metaphor for life. You know, some things, you just got to go with the flow gate, some things are a lot stronger than you may think. So how to avoid this is basically get really centred yourself, find your true north, Get really clear around specifically, yes, control is important. So you want to get this right, but not controlled to the point where it's self-sabotage. And that's the main point that I want to make today. Regarding self-sabotage, of course, you need control. But if you control to such an extent that you become a control freak, you know, and every time you do that, I'm just telling you this, test your body, every time you try to control things, and your body constricts, it basically tightens up again. And this is important because, from a holistic point of view, your body's talking to giving you all sorts of messages. But of course, as we've mentioned, in many other episodes, if you're unaware, you just think that's just normal, but I don't think it's normal. I think it's something that at times is self-created, the next enemy of an abundant lifestyle, you know, it's been trapped in the judgment of others. And remember, I've been in the image world the self-perception world, reputation management world for a long time, well over 30 years. So this is like, you know, one of those subjects that I specialize in, inside out, okay, so regarding soft judgment, I have many clients, of course, that might have come to me from a coaching perspective, initially, from that perspective, it could have been the soft judgment around the physical appearance, around their looks around the white, you know, around basically how they communicate, how they negotiate, et cetera. But it was all mostly around comparing themselves with others. And this is really, it's a sad one for me, because the more you do that, the more you compare yourself to others, the more what you're doing is going away from yourself, you're looking at life esoterically, as opposed to occasionally looking at it. esoterically, you gotta go inside, okay, and that's a big one. And of course, in today's culture, judging, you know, you go on Instagram, and before, you know, people are comparing themselves to the sort of charmed life that others have, by the way, most of it is bullshit. Most of it is fake, and most of it does not exist, other than in the image maker they've created to con a lot of people online. And I have a lot of evidence to support this. I'm not just making flippant remarks here. And of course, when you do that, there's no mistake that a lot of people over time suffer stress, anxiety, and mental health problems. And eventually, maybe depression and worse. So this is really, really important to really take that on board. And of course, a lot of the work in reference to self-image and so on is really to let that go. And that's an area that we support big time. And of course, an area that we focus on with their clients, virtually as part of the program. And the last one for today is basically arrogance, you know, it's about how can we learn what we already know. Now the arrogance is a big one, that I have obviously experienced in many, many different situations. And what that means is you have too much at stake in the existing knowledge that you have. So you're attached to it, and you don't choose to let it go. But that statement it means this of course, everything you've learned, everything you've picked up along the way has served you to this moment in time. But if your ego part of arrogance, right, what I would call is an unhealthy ego does not allow new information to come in your operating from the perspective that you already know everything. Now, you know, I'm sure you'll meet a lot of people like that out there. I'm sure you know, a lot of those people could be in your workplace, etc. So we know what happens in that case and you you've been in those meetings where you've been with somebody or even a social setting when somebody is normal, they are so arrogant from the perspective that they know everything okay, they know they know every single thing. And of course, See, that's a serious problem. Okay, because long term, that arrogance is actually holding them back, they just don't know that. And holding them back could also be the big one in relationships, people might probably be polite to them or whatever, but they certainly will be most likely talking behind their backs. So that's a big one, you know? And specifically, how do you avoid that? Well, first of all, it's all, you know, remember, life, the journey is all about Know thyself. So know thyself means virtually, you're a student for life, there's no moment in time that you know everything. And the wise person would say, I know nothing. I know absolutely nothing. Meaning you're opening yourself up to possibilities of new knowledge, new insights, and new wisdom to come into your life by basically operating on that. Now, of course, you might know a lot, okay. But again, what we're talking about here is, you know, what else do you need to know, to make your life even more joyful, and that's why at times, I bang on about the guy with a PhD, that is highly, highly intelligent. But then life is out of control, what I would call is educated, derelict. So and of course, I can use that example on somebody on the opposite spectrum of that as well. What I'm trying to make a point about here is, that there's a time to access all of these things that human beings have got, including maybe there will be a point where arrogance might have served you. I'm not denying that. But what I'm saying is, in reference to moving forward on this transformational journey, you're going to be open to saying, I don't know, I'm willing to take on new information, and really deal with my ego around that, because life's too short to do otherwise. However, you always have to watch for self-sabotage constantly. And you know, and be lights about it. And what I share with my clients is do not basically beat yourself up or dare to fail in reference to this particular issue. Don't beat yourself up, okay? You've stuffed up, it's okay. You know, arrogance would say I haven't stuffed up, and then you go into cover-up or whatever. Now I accept that I own it. And let's just move on. Because basically, if you don't, that will definitely hold you back. No question about that. Just let it go. You know, and that's what I sort of shared from the start, like, stop it, okay, this is an important maybe put that on your wall, every time self-sabotage comes up, just go back to the two words, stop it. In fact, let me share with you my own experience of self-sabotage, and how I managed to overcome it. Well, look, in my early years, as a designer, what many awards were living, you know, this lifestyle around fashion, around style, of course, and the beauty that comes with that beautiful person, beautiful surroundings, you know, and a lot of fun. And that sort of scene, if you can imagine that can actually make you arrogant, can make you think that you know you that you've got it all. And it's all an illusion anyway, you know, it's all an illusion. So what specifically, I learned along that journey, and by the way, when you're younger, it's certainly different to, you know, when you're a little bit out there, and you've had a lot more life experience. But what I learned through my time was to dig down. Even if I was inconsiderate of others, because of that ego. Deep down, I didn't feel good about it. And I suppose that reveals from a conscious point of view that I was conscious, you know, especially after you evaluated, you evaluate that whole experience. So what happened was, that I decided to go on a soft journey of constant growth. And through that, of course, I've done different programs, different work on myself, including some edgy stuff that would be specifically I suppose, not that common in reference to dealing with ego. And what that gave me was an opportunity and access to new power, internal power that was there, but hadn't been cultivated. Now, that might not make a lot of sense to you right now, because I'm not going into a lot of detail. But what you know means is, I'm going on a self-journey, whatever that looks like for you. And it could be for some people, it could be a speak to a friend, a colleague, a mental therapist, right, a personal development workshop, whatever it is for you, but it's important to, you're only going to do that if you agree with the philosophy or Know thyself, because if you're not if you don't know thyself, you know, and you're just going into doing as opposed to being as well. Obviously, you're going to attract a lot of this constantly and you won't even know that it's possible, you're going to think I know that this is normal. This is who I am. Well, is it. So if you'd like that chat today, I can't ask you to write the show again on Apple podcasts. And just a reminder. And if you do, please send us again a confirmation. And we will send you an e-book free, the real-world guide to authentic personal branding. You can also find me on social media. My Twitter is Jon_Michail, and my LinkedIn is Jon Michail, and on Facebook, you can find me as Image Group International. I'd like to thank you all again today for giving me your time, and I look forward to seeing you next time. Cheers.

20:41
Jon Michail’s Personal Branding Masterclass" Podcast is sponsored by Image Group International, a global team of practical, digitally savvy personal brand and image strategists, based in Australia, committed to maximizing your impact, influence and authority in the business world.   To learn more and apply for your personal coaching, seminars and group workshops please visit imagegroup.com.au or call 1800 631 311.